If you want to read a perfect book there is only one way: write it.

ETHNOLOGY, n. The science that treats of the various tribes of Man, as robbers, thieves, swindlers, dunces, lunatics, idiots and ethnologists.

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.

An accident is an inevitable occurrence due to the actions of immutable natural laws.

UNIVERSALIST, n. One who forgoes the advantage of a Hell for persons of another faith.

REACH, n. The radius of action of the human hand. The area within which it is possible (and customary) to gratify directly the propensity to provide.

Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.