MUGWUMP, n. In politics one afflicted with self-respect and addicted to the vice of independence. A term of contempt.

Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.

Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.

Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a joke.

Religions are conclusions for which the facts of nature supply no major premises.

Forgetfulness - a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.

Impiety. Your irreverence toward my deity.