MUGWUMP, n. In politics one afflicted with self-respect and addicted to the vice of independence. A term of contempt.

EXCEPTION, n. A thing which takes the liberty to differ from other things of its class, as an honest man, a truthful woman, etc.

Coronation: The ceremony of investing a sovereign with the outward and visible signs of his divine right to be blown skyhigh with a dynamite bomb.

PROJECTILE, n. The final arbiter in international disputes. With the growth of prudence in military affairs the projectile came more and more into favor, and is now held in high esteem by the most courageous.

Self-evident, adj. Evident to one's self and to nobody else.

A violin is the revenge exacted by the intestines of a dead cat.

Patriotism: The first resort of a scoundrel.