Empty wine bottles have a bad opinion of women.

Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one's neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.

Scriptures - The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.

ADAGE, n. Boned wisdom for weak teeth.

Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.

SATIETY, n. The feeling that one has for the plate after he has eaten its contents, madam.

OPIATE, n. An unlocked door in the prison of Identity. It leads into the jail yard.