Respectability, n. The offspring of a liaison between a bald head and a bank account.

Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.

PICKANINNY, n. The young of the "Procyanthropos", or "Americanus dominans". It is small, black and charged with political fatalities.

Age - That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no longer the vigor to commit.

SCARABAEUS, n. The sacred beetle of the ancient Egyptians, allied to our familiar "tumble-bug." It was supposed to symbolize immortality, the fact that God knew why giving it its peculiar sanctity.

INDIFFERENT, adj. Imperfectly sensible to distinctions among things.

Cynicism is that blackguard defect of vision which compels us to see the world as it is, instead of as it should be.