The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.

GNU, n. An animal of South Africa, which in its domesticated state resembles a horse, a buffalo and a stag. In its wild condition it is something like a thunderbolt, an earthquake and a cyclone.

Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, advocates and jurors.

Good-bye -- if you hear of my being stood up against a stone wall and shot to rags please know that I think that a pretty good way to depart this life. It beats old age, disease or falling down the cellar stairs.

BEGGAR, n. One who has relied on the assistance of his friends.

YESTERDAY, n. The infancy of youth, the youth of manhood, the entire past of age.

There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don't know.