AUSTRALIA, n. A country lying in the South Sea, whose industrial and commercial development has been unspeakably retarded by an unfortunate dispute among geographers as to whether it is a continent or an island.

PERORATION, n. The explosion of an oratorical rocket. It dazzles, but to an observer having the wrong kind of nose its most conspicuous peculiarity is the smell of the several kinds of powder used in preparing it.

Immigrant: An unenlightened person who thinks one country better than another.

To seek a justification for a decision already made.

GRAPESHOT, n. An argument which the future is preparing in answer to the demands of American Socialism.

BRANDY, n. A cordial composed on one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified Satan.

Scribbler, n. A professional writer whose views are antagonistic to one's own.