Loquacity, n. A disorder which renders the sufferer unable to curb his tongue when you wish to talk.

Good-bye -- if you hear of my being stood up against a stone wall and shot to rags please know that I think that a pretty good way to depart this life. It beats old age, disease or falling down the cellar stairs.

Barometer, n.: An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of weather we are having.

POSITIVISM- A philosophy that denies our knowledge of the Real and affirms our ignorance of the Apparent. Its longest exponent is Comte, its broadest Mill and its thickest Spencer.

TZETZE (or TSETSE) FLY, n. An African insect ("Glossina morsitans") whose bite is commonly regarded as nature's most efficacious remedy for insomnia, though some patients prefer that of the American novelist ("Mendax interminabilis").

Adolescence: The stage between puberty and adultery.

Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.