ANTIPATHY, n. The sentiment inspired by one's friend's friend.

RITUALISM, n. A Dutch Garden of God where He may walk in rectilinear freedom, keeping off the grass.

That part of your friend which it is your privilege to contemplate in your adversity

Economy, n. Purchasing the barrel of whiskey that you do not need for the price of the cow that you cannot afford.

NOMINATE, v. To designate for the heaviest political assessment. To put forward a suitable person to incur the mudgobbling and deadcatting of the opposition.

Contempt; the feeling of a prudent man for an enemy who is too formidable safely to be opposed.

EUCHARIST, n. A sacred feast of the religious sect of Theophagi. A dispute once unhappily arose among the members of this sect as to what it was that they ate. In this controversy some five hundred thousand have already been slain, and the question is still unsettled.