Bacchus, n.: A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for getting drunk.

Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.

Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.

REPUBLIC, n. A nation in which, the thing governing and the thing governed being the same, there is only a permitted authority to enforce an optional obedience.

RECOUNT, n. In American politics, another throw of the dice, accorded to the player against whom they are loaded.

READING, n. The general body of what one reads. In our country it consists, as a rule, of Indiana novels, short stories in "dialect" and humor in slang.

Ambidextrous, adj.: Able to pick with equal skill a right-hand pocket or a left.