Indigestion: A disease which the patient and his friends frequently mistake for deep religious conviction and concern for the salvation of mankind. As the simple Red Man of the Western Wild put it, with, it must be confessed, a certain force: 'Plenty well, no pray; big belly ache, heap God.'

EUCHARIST, n. A sacred feast of the religious sect of Theophagi. A dispute once unhappily arose among the members of this sect as to what it was that they ate. In this controversy some five hundred thousand have already been slain, and the question is still unsettled.

Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.

Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

Destiny: A tyrant's authority for crime and a fool's excuse for failure.

ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.

PROJECTILE, n. The final arbiter in international disputes. With the growth of prudence in military affairs the projectile came more and more into favor, and is now held in high esteem by the most courageous.