Self-evident, adj. Evident to one's self and to nobody else.

DELEGATION, n. In American politics, an article of merchandise that comes in sets.

IMMORAL, adj. Inexpedient. Whatever in the long run and with regard to the greater number of instances men find to be generally inexpedient comes to be considered wrong, wicked, immoral.

APHORISM, n. Predigested wisdom. The flabby wine-skin of his brain Yields to some pathologic strain, And voids from its unstored abysm The driblet of an aphorism. "The Mad Philosopher," 1697

RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.

Income is the natural and rational gauge and measure of respectability.

What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.