SAUCE, n. The one infallible sign of civilization and enlightenment. A people with no sauces has one thousand vices; a people with one sauce has only nine hundred and ninety-nine. For every sauce invented and accepted a vice is renounced and forgiven.

TEETOTALER, n. One who abstains from strong drink, sometimes totally, sometimes tolerably totally.

Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.

Homo Creator's testimony to the sound construction and fine finish of Deus Creatus. A popular form of abjection, having an element of pride.

A nutritious substance supplied by a bountiful Providence for the fattening of the poor.

Genius - to know without having learned; to draw just conclusions from unknown premises; to discern the soul of things.

Rum, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.