An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.
Absence blots people out. We really have no absent friends.
PROPHECY, n. The art and practice of selling one's credibility for future delivery.
Congratulations is the civility of envy.
The place whereon the priest formerly raveled out the small intestine of the sacrificial victim for purposes of divination and cooked its flesh for the gods. The word is now seldom used, except with reference to the sacrifice of their liberty and peace by a male and a female fool.
Miss, n. A title which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market.