The "natural" instincts when someone is going through a breakup are counterintuitive to healing. For instance, many people stop eating or eat very unhealthy, and if your body is not fed the necessary nutrients during this trying time, it's extremely difficult for you to heal emotionally. So, first things first, force yourself to eat, even if that entails drinking green smoothies so you're getting nutrients in your body.
Amy ChanI've learned through the years how to base my identity and sense of self-worth on myself and not others. I've learned the most critical tool of all: self-love. Now, if it doesn't work out with someone, sure, I'll be hurt. But I'll be bruised, not broken. And I may lose my balance, but I won't be wiped off my feet.
Amy ChanI've learned that each time you go through a breakup, the pain isn't any more or less intense or hard, but the way you process and get back up can be different when you learn the tools to get yourself back to equilibrium. There are so many lessons that can be learned during times of heartbreak, and there's an opportunity to grow and become more emotionally healthy.
Amy ChanHold yourself on your own. A man's job in a romantic dynamic is not to be your butler, bank account or your father.
Amy ChanGet in the habit of writing down three things you're grateful for every day. Studies show that in a two-minute span of time, done over 21 days in a row, you can actually rewire your brain. Your brain starts to retain a pattern of scanning the world for the positive versus the negative. Seeing things in a frame of positivity and gratitude is a muscle. You can strengthen this muscle through practice.
Amy Chan