I always got along with all types of people - popular people as well as drug addicts.

I don't really consider myself to be a comedian. I mean, it's not like I'm sitting around writing jokes or anything. I just like dressing up and pretending to be other people.

I live in the moment.

I love theatrical props: a cup filled with solid fake tea, say, or a collection of fake food, including a rubber turkey, which, during the holidays, I wrap in tinfoil so it appears to have just come out of the oven.

Usually, the best ideas come from other people's good ideas, which then, after a short gestation period, become your ideas.

My mom used to say that Greek Easter was later because then you get stuff cheaper.

Begin your story with a sentence that will immediately grab hold of your listener's ears like a surly nun in a Catholic school.