I'm not very good with drink recipes. If I'm entertaining, I like to come up with a house drink for the evening, one thing I'll make for the whole evening of the whole month.

My little brother Paul. He owns his own floor sanding business called Silly P Hardwood Floors and hes really good.

I'm more of a clown, a tragic clown. Yeah. I just like humor to come out of characters.

When people tell me they are going to go scrapbooking, I say, 'Why don't you make it yourself.' It's like chocolate-chip cookies. People buy the cookie-dough roll and slice it, and then they lay it on a cookie sheet. That's not making chocolate-chip cookies.

I like people who would rather something be discovered than shoved in your face.

Begin your story with a sentence that will immediately grab hold of your listener's ears like a surly nun in a Catholic school.

I just hate the whole idea of labeling anything as a comedy. If you tell me something's funny, I'll want to rebel against it. When I go to a bookstore and see books categorized as humor, I get furious. Don't tell me that a book is funny. Let me decide if it's funny. It's the same with sitcoms. You call something a sitcom and people expect it to be funny. And that ruins everything.