Some jobs are so dirty you can only send in someone who has the finely honed hatred of liberals acquired at elite universities to do them.

Although God believers don't need evolution to be false, atheists need evolution to be true.

They spent the night in jail, where their progressive views on gay marriage served them well.

Liberals become indignant when you question their patriotism, but simultaneously work overtime to give terrorists a cushion for the next attack and laugh at dumb Americans who love their country and hate the enemy.

Republicans are afraid to act in accordance with the election results. Republicans seem to be in denial about election results. It's one thing for Democrats to be in denial about the Republican electoral juggernaut, but it's strange that Republicans are in denial about it too.

Faggot isn't offensive to gays; it's got nothing to do with gays.

Democrats see our voluntary military supported by taxpayer dollars as their personal Salvation Army. Self-interested behavior, such as deploying troops to serve the nation, is considered boorish in Manhattan salons.