America is a country that seems forever to be toddler or teenager, at those two stages of human development characterized by conflict between autonomy and security.

When I write a novel, I have what I think of as an icon that helps get me into the world of the book.

That's what makes life so hard for women, that instead of thinking that this is the way things are, we always think it's the way we are.

I never think about issues when I'm working on a novel. Issues are things that happen to people in sufficient numbers to elicit widespread attention; in other words, they're just life happening. That's what I think about: life, and telling a story.

The closest thing to an outline is, because my memory is so bad now, if something occurs to me that I think might be important or pivotal, a lot of times I'll scribble notes down somewhere until I can get back to the book. Of course half the time I look at those notes the next morning and think, "What was that about?"

I learned to love the journey, not the destination. I learned that this is not a dress rehearsal, and that today is the only guarantee you get.

Here is one of the worst things about having someone you love die: It happens again every single morning.