The surest way to learn is by doing it, but often, the lesson is: Don't do it!

My success lies in having achieved a record numbers of failures.

I've found the secret of happiness, total disregard of everybody.

Aren't I lucky, to have survived so much bad luck.

I have just discovered the truth, and can't understand why everybody isn't eager to hear it.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

It's amazing how much research has gone into making some of the worst decisions.