There's not many good comedies to watch - you know, comedies that make you glad you watched them.

Regret is just perfectionism plus time.

Battered Women: sounds delicious. Doesn’t make it right.

Good comics gravitate to each other; you know who's your type of person by watching them onstage, hopefully.

It's not always enough to be brave, I realized years later. You have to be brave and contribute something positive, too. Brave on its own is just a party trick.

If people are well paid for reality television and cotton candy and dunking a basketball, why can't they be well paid for changing young minds?

There's always going to be one more thing. Because that's what infinite feels like. And the difference between love and everything else is that it's infinite, it's built out of something infinite, or it feels like it is, anyway, which is the same thing to us. You think a million billion more things will come your way, a million billion more versions of everything. But no, everything that actually causes that infinite feeling, the circumstances of every infinite feeling, is so, so finite.