...good-Samaritanism in London is considered an extreme sport - like base-jumping or crocodile-wrestling.

My dad was a fairy," said Zach. "And by that I don't mean he dressed well and enjoyed musical theatre.

This is your brain on magic.

The study of the victim is called victimology because everything sounds better with and ology tacked on the end.

I gave the prescribed Metropolitan Police "first greeting". "Oi!" I said "What do you think you're doing?

If you just warn people, they often simply ignore you. But if you ask them a question, then they have to think about it. And once they start to think about the consequences, they almost always calm down. Unless they're drunk, of course. Or stoned. Or aged between fourteen and twenty-one. Or Glaswegian.

That which does not kill us has to get up extra early in the morning if it wants to get us next time.