My kids hear me behind my door, giggling like an idiot, and they roll their eyes at the blatant indignity of it all.

I will go to my grave in a state of abject endless fascination that we all have the capacity to become emotionally involved with a personality that doesn't exist.

My post-child period resulted in one instant change: I write shorter books for kids.

I'd be a Libertarian, if they weren't all a bunch of tax-dodging professional whiners.

I don't get fan mail. It disappeared with the digital revolution.

A mind is a terrible thing. All this evolution nonsense is making me feel like a complete APE!

Irony can elude the genius among us, sometimes.