If I could have drawn a cat yelling for lasagna every day for 15 years and have them pay me $30 million to do so, I would have.

That's the conundrum of cartoon stripping, as opposed to political cartoons. When your anger is the driving force of your drawing hand, failure follows. The anger is OK, but it has to serve the interests of the heart, frankly.

I was never asked to join the Editorial Cartoonists Of America. No fraternity would have me in college, either. I think they know something.

Some of us find our lives abridged even before the paperback comes out.

And just as it is with all proper grannies, she ordered me into my pink bunny jammies.

I ignore Hallmark Holidays. And this comes from a guy who has sold a million Opus greeting cards.

Steve Dallas...a frat-boy lawyer who I knew in school. He's never written me. I suspect he was shot by an annoyed girlfriend, which has saved me many legal fees.