The act of sex, gratifying as it may be, is God's joke on humanity. It is man's last desperate stand at superintendency.

If men found out how to give birth to children they'll never propose again.

I never said anything that was unprintable. Never said anything just for the sake of being startling.

Fasten your seat belts, it's going to be a bumpy night! - As Margo Channing in All About Eve

One can be respected with the truth in Hollywood just as much as anywhere else you know or else I wouldn't have had a career.

If everybody likes you, you are not a very interesting person.

Some young Hollywood starlets remind me of my grandmother's old farmhouse -- all painted up nice on the front side, a big swing on the backside, and nothing whatsoever in the attic.