I'm the luckiest broad on two feet, I'll tell you that. They say once a woman passes 40 she doesn't get any good parts, so I'm blessed.

I'm just happy as a lark having a good health. People say are you thinking about retiring, I don't have time to think about retiring.

If everyone took personal responsibility for their animals, we wouldn't have a lot of the animal problems that we do. I'm a big spay-and-neuter supporter. Don't have babies if you're not going to take care of those babies. We don't need more. We just need to take care of the ones we have. Take responsibility and breathe kindness.

When you start explaining why something's funny or finding a formula for it I think it loses some of its funniness.

Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment

Literally it’s the precise moment when dog doo turns white, but in general it refers to the type of person you don’t want to share your hoogencogles with.

'Mary Tyler Moore' was - it was my first big hit.