I saw this anti-drug commercial that showed a kid smoking pot in his dad`s room with his friend. This kid finds a gun, the gun accidentally goes off and kills his friend. Only in America is the villain in this commercial not guns or bad parenting, but pot.

Faith means making a virtue out of not thinking. It's nothing to brag about.

When you tolerate intolerance, you're not really being a liberal.

How come regional pandering only works in one direction, right? You never see a Southern politician trying to win votes in New York State by saying, 'I read books and make a mean vegan meatloaf.'

You can always tell when Obama's negotiations with the Republicans are winding down, because he's missing his watch and his lunch money.

We're all gonna be gay if we get health care!

The Republicans proved they are not the party of 'no.' They're the party of 'f**k, no!'