The difference between a GOP convention and Comic-Con is that the people at Comic-Con have a much firmer grasp of reality.

And to answer the question that people have about this conspiracy theory that he has a pack in his back, my answer is, if someone was feeding him answers, couldn't they be able to feed him better ones than he came up with?

Again, (America is) a stupid country with stupid people who don't pay attention.

There were two Republican responses to the State of the Union. So if you watched the whole night, it was kind of evolution in reverse. You have Obama, then Paul Ryan, and then Michele Bachmann. Then Animal Planet had a squirrel monkey give his take.

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.

I didn't really think a lot about religion, but I didn't really think a lot against it, either. I was one of those people who didn't go to church, but when I got in trouble I kinda pleaded with God - whoever that was.

This is America. We don't call an election before we know who won. That, after all, is the job of the Supreme Court.