I have always defined political correctness as an elevation of sensitivity over truth.

This party is just full of children, and someone needs to leave them in a hot car.

Well, I hate to tell youbut if you have a flu shot for more than five years in a row, there's ten times the likelihood that you'll get Alzheimer's disease.

To all conservative women out there: If you are so sure the embryo needed for stem cell research are precious human life that can't be destroyed, then implant one in your uterus and bring it to term. That's right, put your cervix where your mouth is.

Republicans don't have to accept evolution, economics, climatology, or human sexuality, but I just watched a week of their national convention, and I need them to admit the historical existence of George W. Bush. If your party can run the nation for eight years and then have a national convention and not invite Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Colin Powell, Karl Rove, or Tom DeLay, you're not a political movement, you're the witness protection program.

What is with this campy fixation on all things Ronald Reagan? They talk about him the way gay people talk about Barbra Streisand. I think they want him on a stamp so they can lick his ass. I think they wanted to name airports after him so they can say, "I'm coming into Reagan!"

Just be happy that something traveled 5,000 miles across the Pacific and, for once, it wasn't your job.