Guns aren't just a tool of last resort. They're awesome. That's why people stroke them. And name them, and take pictures with them. You guys aren't just firearm enthusiasts — you're ammosexuals. And before you try and deny you have some sort of unnatural romantic relationship with your gun, consider this. You're taking it out to dinner! Because it completes you. Get a room.
Bill MaherIf you came into the theater believing in the talking snake, it's kind of hard to leave the theater still believing in the talking snake.
Bill MaherThey told us to buy duct tape and portable radios so that if the world does end, we can all listen to Rush Limbaugh blame it on Clinton.
Bill MaherWhat does it take for Republicans to take off the flag pin and say, 'I am just too embarrassed to be on this team'?
Bill Maher