This is why rational people - anti-religionists - must end their timidity and come out of their closet and assert themselves.

I hear this all the time: 'Obama's policies aren't working.' He hasn't been allowed to put his policies into place.

Now, I'm no doctor, but I am on TV. And in my professional opinion, George Bush is a paranoid schizophrenic.

Rand Paul and Chris Christie both said vaccinations should be a choice, not a government mandate. Because when have Republicans ever told people what they could do with their own bodies?

Iraq now says that it will, after all, destroy its missiles. President Bush said, 'Please, I used to pull the same trick. There'd be an intervention, I'd make a big show of pouring out the liquor and then there was a case under the floorboards.'

I always say to my religious friends, if a pool had even one turd in it, would you jump in?

Kids. They're not easy, but there has to be some penalty for having sex.