The Austrians are brilliant people. They made the world believe that Hitler was a German and Beethoven an Austrian.

The ultimate trick is to convince, persuade. Every single person out there is an idiot, but collectively they're a genius.

Money makes even bastards legitimate.

My Aunt Minnie would always be punctual and never hold up production, but who would pay to see my Aunt Minnie?

I'd worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood.

An audience is never wrong. An individual member of it may be an imbecile, but a thousand imbeciles together in the dark - that is critical genius.

A director must be a policeman, a midwife, a psychoanalyst, a sycophant and a bastard.