Guilt: I'm sorry. I made a mistake. Shame: I'm sorry. I am a mistake.

Joy comes to us in moments--ordina ry moments. We risk missing out on joy when we get too busy chasing down the extraordinary.

Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.

Caring about the welfare of children and shaming parents are mutually exclusive endeavors.

Nostalgia is also a dangerous form of comparison. Think about how often we compare our lives to a memory that nostalgia has so completely edited that it never really existed.

One of the things I talk a lot about in my work that I try to practice - which is really hard - is in those moments where we're being asked to do things or asked to take over or asked to take care of something, we have to have the courage to choose discomfort over resentment. And to me, a huge part of my authenticity practice has been choosing discomfort and saying no.

Then I tell my own story. The two things that people really need to transform is language to understand their experience and to know they're not alone. It's the combination of the researcher-storyteller part.