The story of a mother's life: Trapped between a scream and a hug.

In the '80s, I thought I'd be a success as a woman if I were the president of a billion dollar company, had a sensitive soul-mate husband, two bilingual children, buns of steels, and a compost heap. In the '90s, I pretty much feel I'm a success if I can get through the afternoon without eating a cheesecake.

Breaking up: It's so easy to return their possessions, but so hard to get our brain cells back.

My heart always belongs to the one who doesn't want it.

I'm lucky that my real-life Mom has both a great sense of humor about herself and an amazing ability to slip into complete denial if the subject matter gets a little too close to home.

There are only two secrets to a slimmer shape ... High heels and shoulder pads!

Every time I get something under control in my own life, the world provides more material.