Sometimes you need to be awkward to beat awkwardness

I couldn't believe, I felt as if, like I said, I was going to drap deed y'knaw't a mean?

I'd like to thank ma da (dad)... my mum for doin' aw ma washin'

Say that again, Commonwealth whit? (translation: what?) I'm no used tae hearing that.

Naw, it's like ants up there, man. Like ants that sound like lions!

AWWW ON THE MAIL. The mail man delivers, once again!

That'd be good. That'd be a right good laugh, man. Ye cannae catch me shuttin' up, man