Whenever you're pissed off, just remember that it's better than being pissed on.

When you're born, you're pure. Unspoiled and trusting. Some say, it's the only time we're perfect. You're also born covered in blood and placenta. No one gets nostalgic about that.

Psychiatrist are like mind hookers. Give them 200 dollars and they just screw with your head.

Of course, here's the weird part. After I fought my dad, all of a sudden we're buddies now. Like he's my friend now, we start hanging out. But we're still the same people. So we'd go out on Sunday, you know, and just be hanging out, then he'd, like, pick a guy, and we'd just go beat the crap out of that guy as a team. Memories, huh?

If you're a racist, right now, in 2011... You just look like a retard, man.

Take the time to smell the roses. Sooner or later, you'll inhale a bee and die.

Abortion is an atrocity. Those who practice or praise it are either damn idiots, misguided fools, or treacherous devils.