Abortion is an atrocity. Those who practice or praise it are either damn idiots, misguided fools, or treacherous devils.

I'm the sort of loser who succeeds really well and then drops a turd in the punch bowl.

Japan is the perfect example of make plans, and watch God laugh.

My father, never chooses me for anything. Unless he needs a human shield. Thirty years and all I am to him is a hunk of meat to block buck shot. Told you dad needed me. Who's the best man now?

Lady, if you laugh and you don't make a noise, you're a shaker, and it's freaking me out.

Dad thinks vengeance is the coolest thing about the Lord. That, and turning water into alcohol.

Screw normal. You know why? 'Cause if you're normal, the crowd will accept you. But if you're deranged, the crowd will make you their leader.