I'm always trying to reach a transcendent point, a romantic point, but reach it in a really unconventional way, a really profane way. To get to that romantic, touching, heartbreaking place, but through a lot of acts of profanity.

The lower you fall, the higher you'll fly. The farther you run, the more God wants you back.

What I did was pour out about a gallon of Chanel Number Five and put a burning wedding invitation to it, and boom, I'm recycling.

More than one side? You're Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Jackass!

That's how a good story works. It changes how you feel. It brings you to a greater appreciation, a greater joy, of your own existence.

It takes a lot to get people talking in airplanes. But once they start talking, you just can't shut them up.

The first time we meet another person an insidious little voice in our heads says, "I might wear eyeglasses or be chunky around the hips or a girl, but at least I'm not Gay or Black or a Jew." Meaning: I may be me- but at least I have the good sense not to be YOU.