Some stories, you use up. Others use you up.

Everything is funnier in retrospect, funnier and prettier and cooler. You can laugh at anything from far enough away.

Scratch any fortune and you'll find blood only a generation or two back...child labor in mines or mills...Slavery. Drugs. Stock swindles. Wasting nature with clear-cuts, pollution, harvesting to extinction. Monopolies. Disease. War. Every fortune comes out of something unpleasant.

The best fights don't occur between strangers. They occur between friends who trust each other.

Make me into anything, but just love me.

I used to work in a funeral home to feel good about myself, just the fact that I was breathing.

Now this is the first rule of fight club: There is nothing a blue collar Nobody in Oregon with a public school education can imagine that a million-billion people haven't already done.