Nothing feels as awful as pouring your heart out to some talk therapist, then realizing this so-called professional is actually vastly stupid and you've just professed your most secret secrets to some goon who's wearing one brown sock and one blue sock.

At the last minute, I couldn't wear the Hitler mustache because Tiger Stripe ate it; and then I didn't want to take my kitty and risk his coughing up some big Nazi hairball on someone's front stoop.

Get through the moment. Avoid confrontation. Run away. That's pretty much how we get through our own lives, watching television. Smoking crap. Self-medicating. Redirecting our own attention. Jacking off. Denial.

By the time you're thirty, your worst enemy is yourself.

Everyone wants to be tested and challenged. Everyone would like a good, honest fight to exhaust their frustrations.

Torture is torture and humiliation is humiliation only when you choose to suffer.

We all want to explain ourselves. Nobody wants to be forgotten.