Everyone thinks their whole life should be at least as much fun as masturbation.

I am the child of a lunatic. Not a child of God.

A writer’s job is to cultivate what can go wrong.

All object printed: Love me. Look me. Million speaking objects,begging. Crown American consumer with power of king, to rescue choose and give home or abandon here for expire.

Ideas come at any moment -- except when you demand them. Most ideas come while I'm physically active, at the gym, with friends, gardening, so I always carry pen and paper. My first draft is always written in longhand. But once the first dozen chapters, more like short stories, are written, then momentum builds until I can't leave the project until it's done.

The problem with educating stupid people was that they didn’t know they were stupid. The same went for curing crazy people.

My inventory of people who can save me is down to just me.