In between the Queen and the First Lady, Nancy Reagan, sat Tony Richardson, looking very calm. Later on it emerged that this was because, having not been apprised of the placement until he was about to sit down, he had died of fright. To have expired was to be fortunate.

It's my mission to tell the Australians from abroad in my work that Australia is a wonderful place.

A loose horse is any horse sensible enough to get rid of its rider at an early stage and carry on unencumbered.

In Italy, for the same price as a typical British hamburger meal including sweet, a builder's labourer could eat like a king - rather better in fact, because pasta dishes gain from being kept simple.

A sense of humour is common sense dancing.

A sceptic finds Dallas absurd. A cynic thinks the public doesn't

Bjorn Borg looks like a hunchbacked, jut-bottomed version of Lizabeth Scott, impersonating a bearded Apache princess.