You are offered a piece of bread and butter that feels like a damp handkerchief and sometimes, when cucumber is added to it, like a wet one.

Women do not find it difficult nowadays to behave like men, but they often find it extremely difficult to behave like gentlemen

Beer does not taste like itself unless it is chasing a dram of neat whisky down the gullet - preferably two drams

Love makes the world go round? Not at all. Whiskey makes it go round twice as fast.

You are offered a piece of bread and butter that feels like a damp handkerchief and sometimes, when cucumber is added to it, like a wet one.

The only mystery about the cat is why it ever decided to become a domestic animal.

For me, one of the pleasures of cats company is their devotion to bodily comfort.