On a trip to Israel, Sarah Palin asked the Israelis why they're apologizing all the time. They responded saying, 'Because we told everyone Tina Fey was coming.'

California has gone insane. According to the latest poll, Arnold Schwarzenegger is leading in California's governor's race by 34 points. You can tell that Governor Gray Davis is worried because he spent all day yesterday working on his pecs.

Several hard-core Star Wars fans who had tickets for the first showing actually said that when the movie finally began, they started crying. Mainly because they realized that it's 22 years later, and they still haven't lost their virginity.

It has become cliché to say I laughed until I cried, but when I'm done reading one of [Kupperman's] underground comics my shirt is literally soaking wet. This guy may have one of the best comedy brains on the planet right now.

The U.S. unemployment rate is the lowest it's been in nearly seven years. The job sector that has seen the most growth is in the field of Republican presidential candidates.

It is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique.

Fidel Castro declared that a robot would do a better job as president than Barack Obama. After hearing this, Mitt Romney thanked Castro for his endorsement.