With a cigar like in life, you got to have some length, and some girth.

No matter how bad things are, you can at least be happy that you woke up this morning. D.

They had this movie called Juno about a teenage girl who gets pregnant and it's nominated for an Oscar. That's an unusual experience for me, 'cause when a black girl gets pregnant it ain't no Oscar. It's social work and a box of condoms is what that is.

I'd pick a young white guy over an old white guy for president anytime because the younger guy is more likely to have been influenced by the great social changes of the '60s and '70s.

There is always one person in the office that you want to whip their ass! If you don't know who it is, it is probably you.

With a cigar like in life, you got to have some length, and some girth.

I'm not gonna lie, I love the holidays. But Christmas was a lot more fun when you weren't paying for it.