If I have all the tears that are shed on Broadway by guys in love, I will have enough salt water to start an opposition ocean to the Atlantic and Pacific, with enough left over to run the Great Salt Lake out of business. But I wish to say I never shed any of these tears personally, because I am never in love, and furthermore, barring a bad break, I never expect to be in love, for the way I look at it love is strictly the old phedinkus, and I tell the little guy as much.

You can keep the things of bronze and stone and give me one man to remember me just once a year.

I once knew a chap who had a system of just hanging the baby on the clothes line to dry and he was greatly admired by his fellow citizens for having discovered a wonderful innovation on changing a diaper.

Growing up in that fashion is a breeding ground for insecurity and doubt; it also leaves you questioning motives. It took me a long time to see the world as I want it without constantly looking for approval. I still fall, but I'm better suited for survival.

He [Will Rogers] was America's most complete human document. One-third humor. One-third humanitarian. One-third heart.

I've failed so many times in my life that my recovery time has improved. I'm better at redirecting my attention. I've trained in Radical Aliveness and Core Energetics over the past couple of years and that has allowed me to see how much we project our failures onto others. It has taught me to accept myself. There is real power in owning your truth.

Always try to rub up against money, for if you rub up against money long enough, some of it may rub off on you.