That night was a dark day. Of course, all nights are dark days, because night is simply a badly lit version of day.
Daniel HandlerIf you know somebody very well, like your grandmother or your baby sister, you will know when they are real and when they are fake.
Daniel HandlerOccasionally there are parents who say, "I brought my child so he or she could learn what the career of a writer is like, and you did this long theatrical performance instead, and I'm very disappointed."
Daniel HandlerI'm not a believer in predetermined fates, being rewarded for one's efforts. I'm not a believer in karma. The reason why I try to be a good person is because I think it's the right thing to do. If I commit fewer bad acts there will be fewer bad acts, maybe other people will join in committing fewer bad acts, and in time there will be fewer and fewer of them.
Daniel Handler