Reader: Dear Mr. Snicket, What is the best way to keep a secret? Lemony Snicket : Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you are kidding.
Daniel HandlerI met [my editor] in a bar where alcoholic beverages are served and I bought her one and I told her the idea. And she said that she liked it very much, which embarrassed me because I thought it meant that she was a lightweight and that in the morning, as so many women say to so many men, what seems like a good idea, you know, turns out not to be.
Daniel HandlerThe more I protest that I'm not Lemony Snicket, and that I'm Daniel Handler instead, the more it becomes clear to the audience that I am in fact Lemony Snicket, that I am in fact standing in front of them.
Daniel HandlerAnd when love is over when the diner of love seems closed from the outside you want all those hours back along with anything you left at the loverโs house and maybe a couple of things which arenโt technically yours on the grounds that you wasted a portion of your life and those hours have all gone southside.
Daniel Handler