Today was a very cold and bitter day, as cold and bitter as a cup of hot chocolate, if the cup of hot chocolate had vinegar added to it and were placed in a refrigerator for several hours.
Daniel HandlerThis feeling is not unlike the sinking in one's stomach when one is in an elevator that suddenly goes down, or when you are snug in your bed and your closet door suddenly creaks open to reveal the person who has been hiding there.
Daniel HandlerSomeone feeling wronged is like someone feeling thirsty. Donโt tell them they arenโt. Sit with them and have a drink.
Daniel HandlerIโm not a romantic, Iโm a half-wit. Only stupid people would think Iโm smart. Iโm not something anyone should know. Iโm a lunatic wandering around for scraps, Iโm like every single miserable moron Iโve scorned and pretended I didnโt recognize. Iโm all of them, every last ugly thing in a bad last-minute costume. Iโm not different, not at all, not different from any other speck of a thing. Iโm a blemished blemish, a ruined ruin, a stained wreck so failed I canโt see what I used to be.
Daniel Handler