I never want to be away from you again, except at work, in the restroom or when one of us is at a movie the other does not want to see.

Never look a gift lion in the mouth.

Shyness is a curious thing, because, like quicksand, it can strike people at any time, and also, like quicksand, it usually makes its victims look down.

Whenever you are examining someone else's belongings, you are bound to learn many interesting things about the person of which you were not previously aware.

I met [my editor] in a bar where alcoholic beverages are served and I bought her one and I told her the idea. And she said that she liked it very much, which embarrassed me because I thought it meant that she was a lightweight and that in the morning, as so many women say to so many men, what seems like a good idea, you know, turns out not to be.

Members of your family might say they are working hard all day long, while you are off at school or clarinet lessons, but the only way to know this for sure is to follow them at a discreet distance.

I know what is going on," said Sir. "I am the Boss! Of course I know!