One key lesson of history is that virtually anything, including afternoon or evening thundershowers, causes Germany to invade Belgium.

As you get older; you've probably noticed that you tend to forget things. You'll be talking with somebody at a party, and you'll know that you know this person, but no matter how hard you try, you can't remember his or her name. This can be very embarassing, especially if he or she turns out to be your spouse.

Eugene is located in western Oregon, approximately 278 billion miles from anything.

Earnest is our dog. She senses instantly that something is wrong, and guided by that timeless and unerring nurturing instinct that all female dogs have, she tries to lick my ears off.

The major parties could conduct live human sacrifices on their podiums during prime time, and I doubt that anybody would notice.

Sign at a New England church: Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished?

I hope I don't sound like an old-fashioned stick-in-the-mud, but when I hear about people making vast fortunes without doing any productive work or contributing anything to society, my reaction is: “How can I get in on that?